Party at Gena's!

You guys feel like going to a party? Click here to take part in the blog festivities at Gena Showalter's site!

I'm supposed to have this same stuff on my site, but Blogger won't let me use the text I was given. Gah. But there's lots going on here, so let's have some fun!

HEROES, 10/29

Tonight, in real life, there were no fires to keep the Heroes away. Generally, most of the outbreaks have been shut down or contained near San Diego, although there are still worrisome blazes in some areas. Let's just hope for some good rain. Also, thanks to everyone who checked in and contacted me to see if all was well--I really do appreciate it! No damage to my family or friends, thank goodness, but there are bunches of devastated people out there. Thank you again to all the people who fought those fires in every way possible.

Now, before we begin, I must also say that I'm really excited about CHUCK next week because Bryce will be on via flashbacks. Grrrrrr. Sorry, Chuck honey, but your ex-roommate is smokin' and I am but a weak, weak estrogen-addled female.

On to HEROES.

* Does anyone know who this Adam Monroe is? I shudder to speculate that he is yet another hero we'll invest too much time in. Maybe he's just connected to Peter, based on what he found later in the episode. Please?

* On the "Adam Monroe paper scene"'s heels? Russia. At first I think, "Gah! Now we've got a Russian hero to contend with. This is getting ridicu--" And then Bennet barges in being all threatening and mean-sexy. My attitude is much improved.

* Yaeko's painting. I'm going to confess here: I was spacing out, much as I usually do when Yaeko is on screen. Sad but true. But did it show that she was painting a picture that came true? If so--and judging from Kensei's sudden hero-power, too--what happened to hero development from 1671 on? Did they somehow get wiped out?
And if Yaeko's painting was just a painting, please ignore this.

* LOL for Claire and West's "lesson" to the Mean Girl. Yeah, it was harsh, but much deserved, IMHO. BTW, did anyone think that the high school set up recalled the steps from the "Homecoming" episode? Intentional?

* Aside from the hotness, David Anders really is funny. That look he gave the man who ran him through with the sword? Perfect.

* Yaeko cannot tell brown eyes from blue until now? Unobservant or too dumb to live? Your call.

* HORNY HIRO SCREWS UP HISTORY FOR SOME PRINCESS LOVAGE!
Boy Wonder Refused to Alter Timeline for Charlie the Waitress but Conveniently Forgets Time/Space Continuum for Girl Who Knows Her Way Around a Sword

* HRG's trigger finger!!!!!!!!!!! Dude.

* I was hoping Elle-on-Wheels would be back this week, but no luck.

* Heh--Niki = Mohinder's new pardner. I am suddenly interested in both of them.

That's all I have to say this week. Pretty solid in moving us forward. And it had a decent cliffhanger. But is New York in trouble again? Surely there are other big cities that have incurred the wrath of eeeeee-vil....

Around the 30 Book Mark

A question I'm often asked after people find out that I've been published more than once is this: "Do you write books faster now? Isn't it so much easier?"

I would say...nope. Not even remotely.

See, I just finished chapter 11 of a 12 chapter book, and although today's writing session went well, I feel like I'm running out of steam. Of course, it's normal to feel that way at the end of a story. I see the finish line and I really, really want to cross it.

But, lately, it's been tougher to sit myself down and get myself writing.

Maybe I'm being too hard on myself. After all, you're talking to the chick who, when she first quit teaching and started writing full-time, woke up at 4:30 am three days a week and was writing soon afterward. I had a yoga class at 9:30, so this was my schedule. Sure, I would wake up a little later on the other days, but it was no problem getting up when it was still dark and whaling through those stories. (And I'm really happy with what I produced in those times: THE HUNTRESS and BORN TO BE BAD among them.) Also, later in the day, I used to write a chapter *and* revise it the same day. Good God, I have trouble even revising two chapters a day by themselves now.

How did I do it? Was it the excitement of a new job that's mellowed by now?

What's the deal?

Fire Vibes

Thank you so much to all of you who have contacted me about the fires. Your concern is really touching. :) I feel like such a drama queen because my family was unscathed, thank goodness, and the damage other familes are facing blows my mind. Can you imagine coming home to a smoking shell of where you used to live? Talk about feeling lost. Luckily, there have been minimal deaths and injuries, and I think that's in large part to how the emergency services were handled. Communication was truly excellent--they were ready for this one. I do wish the air assault had started sooner but, from my understanding, the fire conditions had something to do with that. Good old Governator skipped all the paperwork to get us help. So right now, it looks like a total kick ass job by him and the county leaders.

Isn't it scary to know that with all the advances we've made in the last century-plus, we still don't have control over the elements? They can still strike us down within a few days. I'm telling you, seeing all that red (burning areas) on a map and recognizing that your area is surrounded is a real panic. Monday and Tuesday, I was imagining being caged in with no escape. Thanks to the heroics of the community--firefighters, law enforcement, officials, citizens who are donating $$$ and time for the recovery--things are looking up.

Unfortunately, there are sucky stories to go with the ones that show humanity at its best. Consider these tidbits:

-In Ramona, two losers were caught looting evacuated homes.
(Well done, douchebags.)

-One of the fires is said to have been started by an arsonist.
(No punishment is painful enough.)

-At a local mall that served as an evacuation point, a few people built a freaking bonfire, and firefighters had to be summoned to put it out.
(Gah.)

-After one couple returned from a honeymoon to find their home in ruins, salt was added to their gaping wounds when the wife phoned some company (cable?) to let them know that they needed to shut all the services down. The company asked if the couple still had the rented satellite, the wife answered that everything was destroyed, and the company told her that she owed them $300.
(Yes, it's true. I saw this one on the news.)

So...once again, the scales of humanity balance, yin and yang. But without darkness there would be none of the light everyone else has provided. To all those who have worked so hard in this community, you're an inspiration!

Fire Cancels HEROES for Me

Sorry, guys, but there'll be no HEROES gab tonight. I'm visiting SoCal right now and, as you probably know, there are some extremely bad fires going on. Unfortunately, we're on evacuation watch because things are not getting better. The winds are ridiculous and humidity is really low--great conditions to feed and spread fires. So far, over 500 homes have been destroyed, and we can thank an utter lack of precipitation this year for such a disaster. (Thanks, nature--you rock!)

If I have an Internet connection tomorrow, I'll pop back in and hopefully tell you everything is okay....

Whatca Reading?

I have a strange habit when it comes to reading: for the last six years or so, I've kept a little journal noting every book I've read and comments about how much I enjoyed the work. I like to go over it every once in a while, just to see how my habits and maybe even my tastes have changed.

Since I've quit teaching, my book-per-year total has gone down (I used to read about 80 works per year), and at first I was surprised. But it only makes sense. Back in the day, I would read more YA, and a lot of those stories have lower page counts. Also, I wasn't subscribing to as many magazines like The New Yorker and New York Magazine (both of which are full of possible story ideas) and I'm in to more comic series than I used to be. Those have all taken up the time I used to allot to books. Nowadays, if I reach a total of 50 books per year, I'm happy.

Other notable changes? I "read" way more audio selections now, about one per month since I listen to them when I walk. Also, I read more romances because that's how I keep up with "my competition." However, I still try to wade outside my chosen writing genres; otherwise, I feel a little boxed in, and that's not cool when reading is such a portal to other worlds. One more note: I haven't read for pleasure (outside my audio books) as much because I'm doing lots of "research reading."

Most of the scores I give to the books are pretty high, because if I'm interested enough in a work to stick with it, it shouldn't score low. However, there are some middling rankings, too, because I do find myself hoping that certain books will get better. Normally, they end before they do.

I wonder--does anyone else analyze their reading to this extent? Why do I get such enjoyment out of it?

SWEENY TODD Trailer

Are any of you excited about this one?



I love the tone--not only is it totally Tim Burton-eseque, but I feel the grunge and the hopelessness of the characters, strictly based on the color scheme and the dark circles around their eyes. I've never seen this musical, but I know about the macbre storyline. And this sounds weird, but Johnny Depp looks hot.

Yeah.

In the meantime, I haven't gone to see a movie in the theater since the latest HARRY POTTER in IMAX 3-D. It was wonderful. I think TODD will be a big-screen must though....

HEROES, 10/15

Some decent twists tonight yet, alas, no Kensei. Boo!

Anyway, here are those train-of-thought notes:

- Shoot—I was all stoked to see HRG bend back West’s fingers, but then Claire lied about not seeing a boy.

- When Nathan saw his kids at school, I thought that he must’ve taken a long, hard fall from grace if no one even acknowledges the political superstar he was (the teacher didn't seem to, but maybe she was totally focused on protecting the kids? Still, if a disgraced celebrity-type showed up at my school, I would've given him a "Whoa! I know you're a scumbag, but you're famous, too" look.) I suppose, in public, that's why he wears The Beard of Hiding.

- Yup, that’s Sylar pulling the oldest horror movie trick in the book by lying in the middle of a road. I can’t wait to hear how Mr. No Powers got off that island. It didn’t seem to take too long, either, if the Goo Twins and the stoner dude are still on their way to America.

- 30 DAYS OF NIGHT: feral vamps rock!

- Grammy Trekker is crusty and funny!

- Confession: West’s shirt looked too tight and that made me feel a little bit sorry for him. I know.

- The Beard—it is gone! Ooo-wah-ooo-wah.

- Shouldn’t the dumb Goo Twin’s oh-oh radar be screaming when Sylar gets all smarmy and “I know Dr. Suresh”? He sounds like a skeezy guy I would be stuck in a back seat with during a road trip—because that’s my life.

- Monica is spunky and cute so I don’t mind her having POV scenes. Still…Anders has been sacrificed for yet another dang storyline.

- I just… (sigh) How does no one know that West can fly when the fool does it during the day all the time? Maybe I missed something about him having a cloaking function. Did I?

- Oooo—Parkman’s dad is an oldie! Cool, and I love that he has such a goofy smile in the picture. Like father like son. Also, did I see Joanna Cassidy alongside him? That would be sweet.

- Relationship hint for Claire: if a guy tells you to jump from the Hollywood sign, either he’s got an unsettling sense of humor or your relationship is headed for some serious grossness. Maybe both. (Did the writers know that there was a notorious old suicide in that location? Just wondering.)

- Awwwwww. Micah tries to “fix” Monica. Super darling. And does her power have something to do with televised images?

- OMG—little Peter! (And I’m not being dirty.) He’s all dressed for a dance. It’s almost adorable enough to erase the following burned Nathan mirror image, which reminds me of Jessica/Niki, another absentee this week.

- I don’t like seeing Sylar’s chest hair.

- Question answered about Monica. Interesting power.

- Hmmm—first pretty good cliffhanger of the season. I do miss the greatness of last year’s though.

Finally, in the previews…KRISTIN BELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Things are about to get goooooood.

At Celise's Place: Teen Read Week

Celise Downs, who frequently stops by, is celebrating Teen Read Week this coming week. As an ex-middle school teacher, I think this is a great thing, because it's so very tough to battle X-Boxes and Playstation with books. But once a reluctant readers finds a work that interests them--that's huge. So any attention we can give to this push would be great!

Additionally, Celise is giving away prizes and posting "character interviews" based on questions culled from the blog posters. I love this interview idea, and I think there'll be lots of fun to be had. (And how can you resist asking questions to a character named Draven Atreides? Love it!)

Click here to go to Celise's blog!

That Sophomore Outing: ALIAS, HEROES, and MIDNIGHT REIGN

I’m in the middle of going over the galleys for MIDNIGHT REIGN. It’s the last time I’ll get to make corrections before the book goes to print, so I’m looking at every word, every concept very carefully. Since this is book two in a trilogy (and now a bigger series composed of trilogies), I started thinking about what makes a follow-up installment work and what doesn’t. Naturally, during a break, my mind even drifted to some of my favorite geek pursuits. It was unavoidable. ALIAS. HEROES.

But how did my fangirl musings apply to my galleys?

Well, these two shows both had/have sophomore seasons, just like Vampire Babylon, Book Two. But they developed in different ways, and I think (I hope) MIDNIGHT REIGN recalls the second season of ALIAS more than the emerging HEROES continuation.

What’s the difference between those follow-up installments for ALIAS and HEROES? Why did one please the fans while the other is causing all kinds of grumbling on a great number of message boards?

I think the big key here is that when we returned to ALIAS, the writers decided to concentrate on exploring Sydney’s character (and all the beloved returning ones) while HEROES has introduced new ones instead. Oftentimes, it even seems as if HEROES is trying to develop the old characters by seeing how they react to these unknown new forces instead of turning their gazes to what’s already been planted within. To me, this results in superficial character growth at best. With ALIAS, we delved deeper into Sydney’s family and what she’d been lacking all those years by having a “dead” mother and a distant father; in other words, the driving force of the series wasn’t spy games as much as it was Sydney coming to terms with how her rediscovered family fit into a life filled with spy games. (Oddly enough, on the surface, Dawn Madison, my Vampire Babylon heroine, is dealing with the same family dynamics, except her mom may or may not be a vampire and she can’t reconcile with her dad because he’s still missing.)

However, with HEROES, we get Hiro in Japan, interacting on a plot-only-level with those new characters. Now, as much as I love Kensei, how much are we really finding out about Hiro? Sure, he wants to kiss the princess, but I think the “romance” with Charlie from season one told us much more about what Hiro is willing to sacrifice. At the end of the last episode, when Hiro decided to stay in Japan, this introduced a possibility that we might be on a path to some character discovery. I hope. And, to be fair, we’re still at the start of season two, but with the addition of the Goo Twins (and the upcoming New Orleans characters), our time with our old favorites has been diluted, and the writers have so far made the choice to give us plot over characterization. (And I don’t want to hear that “It’s just a comic book! What do you expect?” Sorry, there are plenty of comics out there that balance characterization with plot. “Being a comic book” is no excuse.) The thing is, we know HEROES can do better. Remember “Company Man”? I do, and it gave Noah Bennet a well-rounded, very human composition. Better yet, it illuminated his family, too. There’s hope for Peter, with his “What’s in the box” identity mystery, but so far, all I know is that he’s had his shirt off most of the time.

So while I’m reading MIDNIGHT REIGN, I’m asking myself how my own sophomore outing is structured. There are new peripheral characters involved with a new mystery, but each book in the series uses a what-the-hell-is-happening prologue for its structure. Frank’s whereabouts, which some readers consider to be a main plot mystery of NIGHT RISING, wasn’t really “the big question of the book” in my view—that was Jesse Shane’s murder. Instead, I always saw the whereabouts of Dawn’s missing dad as more of a driving force for her character arc, and that’s something I strongly believe couldn’t be wrapped up in one book. Frank’s situation (which will be uncovered in MIDNIGHT REIGN) allows Dawn to keep growing; what she learns about herself by taking a closer look at him forces her to come to terms with the ugliness within herself. Although she’s trying very hard to do that, it’s a struggle. She’s developed behavior patterns over the years—defenses. Shedding them is an act of courage in itself.

But, in the end, I think that’s how Dawn will eventually become a hero, too….

A Word About the Web Sites

Just FYI: the updated Web sites should be up within the week, if not a couple of days. They're going through some big changes and you'll see what I mean in a few months for www.vampirebabylon.com and then early in the year for www.crystal-green.com.

So please bear with me! I'm really excited about what's going to be happening. :)

HEROES, 10/08

There was a distressing lack of bare male chestage tonight. Hmph. Otherwise, some neat-o stuff, and if you think I'm in a dither because Kensei's storyline appears to be over and done with, read on....

- We open in Metaphorland, where the mystery box serves to introduce the general theme of “not knowing yourself.” We focus on Peter, the manboy who has struggled with a search for self-identity since episode one. Interestingly, the theme is carried out fairly deftly by the end of tonight's action....

- Back when I had time to post on the eHarlequin boards, someone commented that Nadia from ALIAS was “fretful.” I just about fell on my butt laughing because it was such a perfect description. I daresay that it applies to Maya, as well. She is forever fretting, although having black goo leaking from one's eyes entitles her to this character trait.

- Hey, Micah! I just saw you in LADY IN THE WATER. You were a preternaturally smart kid in that, too.

- D.L. is…dead? Seriously? For sure?

- Sylar awakens in a Corona commercial. And…HAH! A new form for Candace! Missy Peregrym is on REAPER now, but unfortunately her role there isn’t quite as interesting as Candace was even within her first 5 minutes of HEROES last year.

- Hiro would do many of us a huge favor if he would just stick an arrow a liiiiiiiiittle bit lower, say, in Kensei’s abs. This, in turn, would require Mr. David Anders to remove more of his shirt so we can see him…erm…healing.

- Alejandro may look like ass, but West embodies it.

- LOL for Kensei’s giddy expression after Hiro tells him he can survive anything. I love K’s mercenary rakishness. Such the bad, bad boy. I would delight in the opportunity to punish him.

- Do West’s powers include the extra special bonus of no one being able to see him flitting amongst the clouds in broad daylight? What was that?

- Masi Oka, you do longing so well.

- OMG, the Goo Twins do not interest me AT ALL.

- Peter’s chest squeezing out bullets! I did not need to see that, even though it was super cool.

- SPECULATION! (If you don’t want any, then continue to the next part….) It looks as if Kensei’s story has come to an end, but if you’ve been keeping up with news, you know that David Anders was hired as a regular after this season’s filming was well under way. (Of course I know that, people.) I think he wasn’t on the Comic-Con HEROES panel because, at the time, this first Kensei story was already wrapped. Then, after the writers realized what a great character and actor they had on their hands (and after they heard a massive roomful of women go squee when Anders ripped off that Kensei mask during the Con previews), they snapped him back up again. Therefore, I don't think it'll be too long before Anders returns. This is the only reason I am quite calm right now and hardly amping out about the apparent conclusion to Kensei’s story.

- Annnnnnnd here we remind the audience of the “who am I”/”what’s in the box” theme with the reveal of Candace’s true form. Candace, we hardly got to explore your neurotic need to shield the figure nature gave you. Besides, the second actress was doing a pretty good job of maintaining Missy Peregrym’s inflections and body language. Bummer.

- Nice reveal of Sylar’s location. I would normally hope that he’s totally screwed and will be major alligator bait, except we all know that Sylar always manages to slither out of every tough situation. He sucks.

- Okay, you all. You know who you are. Stop imagining that Peter’s smooching on you.

- How many of you were anticipating West’s “the man with the horned-rimmed glasses” during that build up? Question: if the perv’s been spying on Claire, wouldn’t he already have seen HRG around? So is West lying right now? Is he working for The Company and reeling Claire in?

- I will go into a depression if HRG dies. Yeah, I know the writers are messing with us, but the mere thought makes me a little panicky.

So. Some pretty good stuff tonight. BTW, does anyone else think that the creators have substituted the previews for last year’s killer cliffhangers?

New TV Season Report Card, Part Two

Here are the new offerings....

TELL ME YOU LOVE ME – HBO - Yes, I am one of the pervs watching this “ooooo it’s got so much dirty sex” show but, strangely, I find the therapy sessions way more addictive than the “naughty” scenes. If you’re not familiar with the premise, the action follows couples who are experiencing trouble in their relationships, and their growth (or regression) is tracked through the way they’re relating through sex. It’s got an indie-movie feel, and the situations seem unsettlingly real at times.

CHUCK – NBC – This show has that extra “something” that’s going to keep me watching. I think it’s the charm of the nerdy leading man and maybe even the utter dorkiness of his best friend Morgan, who manages to crack me up even as he annoys me. And then there’s Adam Baldwin, who rocks all kinds of kick ass as a shady spy guy. But the clincher? When Chuck revealed a secret about LOST’s Oceanic Flight 815 in the second episode. Love!

JOURNEYMAN – NBC – We’re gonna see about this one. I’m slightly intrigued by the supposedly dead ex-girlfriend who’s also slipping through time with the hero, but as of right now, Dan’s time traveling purposes aren’t making a lot of sense in the bigger picture. However, Reed Diamond from HOMICIDE is in it, and I’ve missed him dearly.

REAPER – CW – Love the premise: on Sam’s 21st birthday, he discovers that his parents sold his soul to the devil and Satan himself has come to put Sam to work as a bounty hunter for souls that have escaped hell. This show is cute and has its moments of hilarity, but the extra “something” that CHUCK has is missing for me. I’m already a little worn out on the “Sam gets his weekly vessel and uses it to capture the freak of the week” pattern, but I'll stick with this because there's lots of potential.

PUSHING DAISIES – ABC – Wow. Okay, in my last blog entry, which I had written before seeing this on my DVR, I said there were no shows that blew me away this season. I was wrong. PUSHING DAISIES has everything: a fresh tone, a surprisingly edgy mystery, and colorful characters I want to know more about. I love the “death touch” rules and how they affect The Pie Maker and Chuck’s relationship, and Chi McBride’s practical PI lends some weight and balance to all the heavily advertised whimsy. Some of the romantic moments can approach overkill, but that’s okay by me; the over-the-top-ness absolutely fits the mood. This one’s a keeper.

KID NATION – CBS – I’m still not sure whether to like this or not. I enjoy seeing the feisty youngsters devoting so much energy and pride to their work, but every once in a while, when CBS suggests they kill a chicken, I’ll hate myself for watching.

PRIVATE PRACTICE – ABC – Didn’t really like the “backdoor” pilot during GREY’S ANATOMY last season. Didn’t like the first real episode at all. Lasted a half hour. I airlocked this one already.

BIONIC WOMAN – NBC – I basically enjoyed the pilot from Comic-Con, but we’ll see about this one, too. Again, like REAPER, I realized there’s “something” missing here for me. Heart? Soul?

KITCHEN NIGHTMARES – Fox – I’ve already blogged about this, and I’m still bummed out that the producers made this American production a freak show instead of a decent improvement story the audience can emotionally invest in. However, the last episode was better, so we’ll see.

DIRTY SEXY MONEY – ABC –I have to say that I kinda adore this show. I see all kinds of possibilities for the kooky Darling family, and Peter Krause? Miss him from SIX FEET UNDER and am happy to be in his comforting everyman presence again.

BIG SHOTS – ABC – Three words: Special Agent Vaughn. Thus, no matter how bad the premiere was, I’m watching. But there’s good news ahead: Rob Thomas of VERNONICA MARS genius will be coming on as show-runner. Sweet!

MAD MEN – AMC – This amazing show started during the summer. Beautiful cinematography, killer period setting, poignant storytelling with an edge, and it’s been renewed for a second season. Sometimes the suits do get it right.

MOONLIGHT – CBS – I don’t know, you all. I should love this show, yet I don’t. Attractive vampire hero? Check. Plucky mortal heroine for whom the hero pines? Check. Noirish setting and vibe? Check. So why am I not into it?

We'll see what falls away during the coming weeks. In the meantime, what are you all watching?

New TV Season Report Card, Part One

It's that time again!

Yes, I have been sampling all the TV premieres in an attempt to weed out the programs that won't earn a season pass on my recording thingie. I have to say that, so far, there aren't any new shows that have really grabbed me like LOST did when it premiered a few years ago, or even when HEROES did last year, but there's still lots of potential.

So without further yappity-yap, here're some thoughts about the returning shows that have previously been on my schedule. I'll be posting new programs Saturday....

CURB YOUR ENTHUSIASM – HBO - Although there are still uncomfortable laughs every once in a while, I can’t help but think that some of the joy has been sucked from this show. Maybe it has to do with Larry David’s personal life, but the situations don’t seem as fresh. For a show that didn’t seem to follow a formula, things seem mired in one now.

DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES – ABC – This show is “on notice” for me, meaning that I’m willing to drop it. But with Nathan Fillion and Dana Delany moving into the neighborhood, I’m interested again!

DEXTER – Showtime – It’s gory yet humorous, depraved yet somehow moralistic. Dexter, the serial killer who takes out his sociopathic urges on society’s deviants, is a complex character. I love him and the Miami setting—plus all the tense murder scenarios that twisted through season one. I’m optimistic season two will be just as good, with Dexter experiencing mental and external barriers in his quest to “take out the trash” around his community.

BROTHERS & SISTERS – ABC – I have grown to absolutely love this show. Maybe it’s the way the actors have come to fully embody the characters. Maybe it’s the clever, sharp writing. Who knows, but I never predicted that I would ever enjoy Calista Flockhart again—and I totally do.

PRISON BREAK – Fox – After the corny wigginess of season two, where every attempt was made to stretch the limits of reality, I didn’t know what to expect from season three. I’m happy to say that since Michael the Hottie has been incarcerated in a jail that is far worse than the place he first escaped, things are copasetic. Yeah, PRISON BREAK is still moronic most times, but it’s back to being a fun kind of moronic, thanks to some relatively tighter writing. It’s not back to season one form, but I’ll stick around to get me some more of Hottie’s blue steel.

DANCING WITH THE STARS – ABC – What’s there to say except that Albert got a raw deal and I’m rooting for Scary Spice all the way?

HEROES – NBC – If you all have been reading my horny blog entries late every Monday night, this needs no further explanation.

AMERICA’S NEXT TOP MODEL – CW – Like eating Dreyer’s Slow Churned ice cream, this show provides empty half-the-calories, but such yummy pleasure. Same as it ever was.

UGLY BETTY – ABC – Love! True, the opening episode’s heavy-handed Santos fake out wasn’t cool, but OMG did I miss Mark and Amanda.

MY NAME IS EARL – NBC – A one-hour supersized opening episode was a bad idea for a show that’s really funny during the thirty minutes it should be allotted. Even so, there are too many belly laughs every week for me to give this one up.

30 ROCK – NBC – The Seinfeld premiere is tonight, and I’m stoked. By the end of last season, this show got extremely harrylarious.

SMALLVILLE – CW – A promising start to the season, IMHO. Lana is still alive (Boo!), but Chloe is, too, and that’s good enough for me. Also, Supergirl should be a strong addition; it sounds as if they’re going to be using the latest DC backstory for her, and that spells trouble for Clark seeing as (SPOILER! Don’t keep reading if you don’t want to know: Kara was dispatched from Krypton before it exploded in an effort to assassinate Kal-El wherever he ended up). Yee-hah!

GREY’S ANATOMY – ABC – My DVR didn’t record the opening episode, and I’m surprised to realize that I don’t really care. Unexpected but true.

THE OFFICE – NBC – Like MY NAME IS EARL, the one-hour opener was stretched out, hence diluting the funny. But I’m still their huckleberry.

CSI – CBS – I’d stopped watching this one until last season, when the Miniature Killer visited all that havoc on the team. I realized how good the writing was, so I’m back.

Tune in Saturday for those new programs!

HEROES, 10/1

Pretty fun stuff tonight, and much of it seemed to revolve around shirtless men and toe snipping.

Stream of consciousness notes:

- We open with Peter, shirtless and WET. Now this is the way to start a show, damn it!

- Oooo—Kensei nipplage. I’m way too excited about this little peek, and I'm afraid to analyze what that means about my psyche.

- Oh, God—the second I see the computer lizard getting a limb cut off, I know that this will be the episode in which Claire will cut off her toe. (Remember my Comic-Con report about the teaser footage?) By the way, West is still creeping me out.

- Quoth Alejandro to Maya after she worries that she’ll lose control again: “I won’t let that happen.” Um, does anyone recall him saying that during the last episode right before peoples’ eyes started dripping black goo?

- Mohinder speaking French = hu-humana humana. As if his regular accent wasn’t hot enough. (And I think I remember him speaking a little like a valley guy at the Comic-Con panel. It was weird to hear an un-accented Suresh. Weird and bummer-like.)

- Princess Leia alert! Lone chick goes samurai on a bunch of men. Fiesty.

- LOL for Hiro “Kensei” using his powers. And LOL for “Kensei” suggesting the name for the so-called battle.

- Nice moment between “Kensei” and the princess. Annnnnnd this will lead us to the tried-and-true Cyrano romantic plot in which the masquerading sad-sack hero will make the heroine fall for the undeserving faux-hero. Meh.

- Eeeeeeeeeeeek—freakin’ Maya with those eyes! Okay, she is officially creepier than West. At least until he shows up on screen again. Then it's an open race for the title.

- At this point, I’m like, “David Anders better be in this next segment.” Nope.

- Too bad Claire can’t grow back cars like she does limbs.

- Heh—Gramama Petrelli and Kaito got busy back in the day! Saucy.

- This serial killer confuses me. “He” had to skulk around in a hoodie and gracelessly mow Kaito down from a building last time. But now his assault on Gramama looks far more elaborate and hero-ish. Wonder why. Any theories? Will it even turn out to be the same killer in spite of the "clue"?

- WHERE’S ANDERS??????????????????????????????

- Finally.

- So the princess didn’t notice a height difference between “Kensei” and Kensei? She might be fiesty, but not that bright.

- We all knew Kensei wasn’t dead. He’s just Claire.

- Le Haitian! Welcome back.

- Uh, yeah—the toe snip in all its barfy glory. I think watching it grow back was even nastier than seeing it cut off. Even creepier though? West’s mug in the window.

Will we become familiar with Peter’s package next week? (Tee hee.) And Claire was looking pissed at HRG. Will West turn out to be a bad influence?